Last year I did a 2012:
Year in Review post, based off a New Year’s tradition that my family has
done as long as I can remember. I figured I’d keep up that tradition by doing
another Year in Review blog post this year. So here we go…
Neatest Place You were in 2013
Again, like last year, I feel
like I haven’t gone far. Other than Alberta and Idaho Falls, I have only been
outside of Utah once this year, when we went on our family cruise to the
Caribbean. It was really cool to go to Mexico and finally use the Spanish I had
been studying for three semesters. Belize was really relaxing, just spending
the day at an ecotourism spot with my parents and my baby nephew Carson. And in
Honduras I went zip-lining with my siblings and my two older nephews. I’m not
sure I could pick one of those ports as my favorite, but it was all definitely
adventure!
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| Mexico! (August 2013) |
Biggest Surprise of the Year
There isn’t one “surprise of the
year” for me. Looking back to where I was a year ago, there is no comparison. A
year ago, I was incredibly codependent. A year ago, I did not believe I could
do my classes. A year ago, I wasn’t sure I was worth loving. Now, I have hope.
I am beginning to learn what it means to love myself and truly care about
myself.
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| My Voice(s) of Hope Shoot (September 2013) |
Best TV Show/Movie You Watched
Easy answer. Doctor Who. I got
introduced to it by my friend Josh at the beginning of the year and Garrett and
I quickly took to it. Enough that we dressed up as two of the Doctors for
Halloween and the Doctor Who 50th Anniversary Special… And I’m
looking for an excuse to dress up in my Doctor costume again. It’s a science
fiction show, but I’ve also had some amazing insights from watching it about depression/suicide
and about agency/emotions.
It continues to inspire me and continues to give me hope.
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| Garrett and I as the Doctors for Halloween (October 2013) |
Saddest Day/Time in 2013
This is the one where I get
vulnerable I suppose. The moment I was lowest emotionally this year. Back in
March, I had a day where I was more depressed than I can ever remember before.
So low that I felt I was unworthy of suicide. That day I was blessed to feel
support from many friends and it was then that I began working hard on my
self-esteem to keep that from happening again.
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| Jordan River temple trip (July 2013) |
Happiest Day/Time in 2013
In contrast to March, the past
few months have been the best part of my year. I have felt more comfortable
with myself and more okay with who I am. I still have a lot to work on, but the
past few months have been the healthiest for me, I think. I am aware of many of
my weaknesses, but I am willing to work on it. I will continue to work on it
throughout the rest of my life.
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| Quidditch for Garrett's birthday (September 2013) |
Best Book/Magazine You’ve Read
Of all the books I’ve read in the
past year, the one that I enjoyed the most and the one that has changed me the
most was “The Continuous Atonement” by Brad Wilcox. I read it earlier this year
and it completely changed how I see the Atonement. Put simply: Life is not
about me being perfect; it’s about me never giving up and about trusting that
Christ can help me become a better man.
Things You Will Remember From the News
I’ll be honest. I don’t watch or
read the news much at all. The only news clip I remember watching was after the
Reconciling Faith and Feelings Conference in November. ABC
did a short story on it, the purpose, and the success that they had.
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| Reconciling Faith and Feelings website |
Favorite Talk in Church/Conference
My favorite conference talk this
year would probably be Elder
Holland’s talk about depression and other mental disorders in October. Having
felt depressed, it felt nice to have that feeling validated. Though never
diagnosed with depression, I have felt depressed. I also really loved Elder
Bednar’s talk from April. It helped me understand the Law of Chastity a lot
better and to appreciate more the great trust and gift that the Lord has given
mankind.
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| Jeffrey R. Holland |
What Would You Like to Do In 2014?
Well, I know one thing I want to
do in 2014: I want to travel out east again. I was accepted for the Hill
Cumorah Pageant a couple weeks ago, so I’ll be spending July 4-20 in Palmyra. Somewhere
around that (either before or after Pageant) I’m going to visit Toronto again
(I am not getting that close to my mission and not visiting people that I
love). Besides that, I am going to keep working on my degree, learning what I
need to in order to provide for my family. I am going to keep working on myself
in therapy and related groups, so that regardless of what happens (marriage,
singleness, or whatever) I can be happy. I am going to continue to learn what
it means to be a missionary and a disciple of Christ.
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| Garrett and I at the Hill Cumorah (July 2012) I'm going back!!!! |
