My Origin Story

The grades are in. I’m done. My last class at BYU is finished. The only thing left is for my diploma to come in the mail. The end of my seven years at BYU has made me reflect on how I got to this point. I’ve been noticing just how different I am from the kid who graduated from high school in Southern Alberta. As a result, I knew I wanted to write this post.

I tossed it around in my head back and forth whether I wanted to write this for my blog or for Mormon Geeks, but I felt that it fit best here. Maybe it’s cheesy to call this my origin story, but it kind of makes sense in a way. While I still lack super powers (keep my fingers crossed though, right?) I have grown much more than I thought I would.

Back in high school and middle school, I was into Yu-Gi-Oh, Digimon, Pokemon, Harry Potter, LOST, and probably some other stuff too. But no one could know. At least not about the weirder stuff like the anime. I don’t remember if I was every explicitly teased for those things when I was in high school, but it was always a worry.

Fast forward seven years to today. I’ve done things I never thought I would:

• I’ve been a missionary, maybe not as long as I thought or in ways that I expected, but I’ve been able to serve the Lord.
• I have best friends. In middle school, the idea of having a best friend was only a dream. Now I have many close friends. I wish I got to see many of them more, but I know they’re there.
• I went to a football game (both American football and real football) and I enjoyed it. Granted it had more to do with the company I was with, but go figure that I had fun.
• I’ve opened up about the parts of my life that I once thought were the deepest and darkest. Now they’re my greatest teachers.
• I’ve learned two languages and forgotten one. Technically I can’t say I ever learned ASL, but I learned some. However, I did learn Spanish. I became more proficient in Spanish than I ever was in French, which I have more or less lost at this point.
• I learned that I like hiking. In Scouts, I hated it, but maybe that had more to do with not having friends in Scouts. Now I love exploring (I should really do a hike sometime in the near future…)

• I’ve been to Disneyland. TWICE! And I’m going back this fall. Be jealous.
• I learned to travel alone. Since my mission(s), I have flown on my own to California, Louisiana, Michigan, New York, and Spain. I used to think flying was so complicated, but I’m doing a pretty good job at it now.
• I learned that I like working out! I had a curiosity about it before, but now I crave that hour so two at the gym each day. It gives me a high that I thoroughly enjoy, even when I feel super sore.
• I’ve embraced my geekiness. Whereas in high school I hid it, now I flaunt it. I dress up as video game, movie, and TV show characters for Comic Conventions and any other opportunity just because it’s fun. Heck! I write for a blog entitled “Mormon Geeks”. How much geekier could it be? Seven years ago I would have NEVER done that! I even played Quidditch that one time for Garrett’s birthday.
• I learned that I like to drive. In high school, I was scared of driving. I didn’t want to get my license because the idea of getting in a wreck was so scary. Now I drive nearly every day and I depend on it way more than I wish I had to.
• I’ve visited Central America! Granted it was only for 6 hours per day for three days, but I got to visit Belize, Roatan, and Mexico briefly during our family cruise. Despite traveling from Canada to the US throughout my life, I’d never got further south.

• I got to be a best man in a wedding. Well, kinda. Garrett didn’t have groomsmen at his wedding, but I did take charge of the bachelor party and I may have (or may not have) decorated his car at the reception. Never mind the fact that I was blown away to have real friends, I never expected to have that close of a friend.
• I’ve attended several concerts! Granted, where I grew up was not conducive to attending concerts, but I wasn’t enough into music to care. Now I’ve been to four concerts in the past four years (possibly another one this year too).
• I willingly participated in the Hill Cumorah Pageant again and alone. Both times previous, I had been in the cast with my family, but in 2014 I made the step and joined the cast by myself. It was scary not knowing anyone, but it must have been okay since I’m going again (flying out this Friday).

• I went to Europe! I spent two months in Spain on a study abroad. Especially since I didn’t feel 100% comfortable with the language, this was a big step. Also, it was scary because I didn’t know any of my classmates before I left. One of the best decisions I made at BYU to learn Spanish and go to Spain.
• I started running and I like it! What is it with all of these athletic things that I enjoy now? I hated running in gym class, but now I’m running to get a high to deal with stress. What’s going on with me? One of the highlights of my day is putting Netflix on and watching an episode of whatever on the treadmill. Also my two Dirty Dashes. I never thought a mud run would be appealing, but I love it!!!
• I’ve met celebrities! Granted all of the celebrities I’ve met so far have been Doctor Who actors, but who cares? They’re my celebrities. I even got to interview a couple of them this past Comic Con FanX.
• I got a full time job before I’d even graduated! I’ve been working at Chrysalis for a year now, but I became a house manager in January, six months before I was done school.

I honestly can’t say which of these things surprises me the most. As lost as I feel at times, in some ways that’s what’s best. If I knew what was going on in my life, I wouldn’t have applied for this job when I did, I wouldn’t have taken the risks that I have, and I wouldn’t have gotten to know myself as well as I have. As much as I don’t think at times that I know who Spencer Ficiur is, maybe I know him better than I think. Maybe he’s more confident than I give him credit for. 

“And I do this for a wise purpose; for thus it whispereth me, according to the workings of the Spirit of the Lord which is in me. And now, I do not know all things; but the Lord knoweth all things which are to come; wherefore, he worketh in me to do according to his will.” (Words of Mormon 1:7)

The most surprising thing… Tonight, I feel at home in the world.

All I Want For Christmas

It’s been a whirlwind of a year, I’d say. For those of you who haven’t heard (which I guess would be anyone who chanced upon my blog and doesn’t know me personally), I’m home again as of the beginning of November. I’ve been meaning to write a post about my feelings on coming home, but I’ll save that for another day. Today, being Christmas, I wanted to share some thoughts I’ve had today.

Today, I didn’t get to be with family. I didn’t get to go home and the majority of my day has been spent sitting in my apartment by myself. But you know what? That’s okay. Earlier today, I had the chance to work a lunch shift. Now, working at the MTC cafeteria has been a challenge for me in the past. Last summer, I was so jealous of the missionaries there that I almost wanted to quit. Even since being back in Provo, I’ve wondered how smart it was for me to start working at the MTC again. Today, none of that mattered though. I got to spend Christmas Day serving Christmas dinner to ordained servants of God. I’m so grateful for the missionaries today (and there was many of them) that thanked me and my coworkers for working Christmas Day (and even more so since it was Sunday too) so that they could have a Christmas dinner. Many times throughout the shift, I thought to myself “How lucky am I to get to spend Christmas serving God’s army?” Every “Thank you” and “Merry Christmas” that those Elders and Sisters said made my day.

It’s been an interesting change being back from my mission again. A year ago, I remember thinking (and probably telling a couple people, like my parents) that all I wanted for Christmas was to go back on my mission. Today, I’m just grateful to be in Provo with a job and to be in my old ward (despite how much turnover the ward had since I left). I honestly don’t know what I’d ask for a Christmas present. Maybe it’s the fact that my parents gave me my one Christmas surprise the night I came home (I get to spend this coming week in California with my entire family… it’ll be the first time in over seven years that all of us will be together) and I knew that that was my Christmas present. I guess if I had to choose one thing that I want for Christmas it would be just friends… to be able to spend time with the people I care about, to be able to make new friends in an essentially new ward, and to find a group of friends to have more good times with. This part, I guess, just comes back to trusting that my Heavenly Father will put people in my path to become friends with… that’s what happened with Garrett… that’s what happened with Eric… that’s what happened with Justin… it’s happened every time since I’ve come to BYU.

I know that He loves me. I know that He watches out for me. I know that He gives me the people I need to become who I need to be. I’m grateful for this time of year that the entire world is turned toward the birth of the Savior. Yesterday, I posted a scripture on Facebook in honor of Christmas Eve with a little note. I want to share that scripture and that note here too:

"Lift up your head and be of good cheer; for behold, the time is at hand, and on this night shall the sign be given, and on the morrow come I into the world, to show unto the world that I will fulfil all that which I have caused to be spoken by the mouth of my holy prophets." (3 Nephi 1:13)

The sign of the Savior’s birth saved the Nephites from physical death. His death and Atonement saves each of us from spiritual death if we will come unto Him.

Merry Christmas!